Maybe (ex_peacock902) wrote in bipolar_bunnys,

magical thinking and bipolar

this i had in my journal but thought i would share here

I was talking with Lizzie about mask makers. thinking about them now. The old ones of old times back when theater was sacred and ritualistic. The mask makers would see faces in the bark of trees and then cut out the face and carve in the details and make a mask. Then the performer, or perhaps the one channeling a spirit for a trance dance type ritual, would observe the mask and then put it on and merge with the spirit. Method acting actually is not so far off from this. You observe the character and then merge you own emotions with it. Anyways I am wondering if I was a mask maker in past life because I so easily see faces in trees. I also think about the Druids. Druid means tree-seer. I guess I am a Druid of sorts too. I also used to in certain states of mind be able to envision these patterns in people's skin. Way back when my Miami ancestors were tatooists, the only tribe in that part of America to have tattoos. I imagine that the tatooists would envision the pictures on the skin and then would fill it in. This sort of magical thinking I have can be mistaken sometimes for psychosis. But the thing is when I am psychotic it is a much different experience. I am then unable to tune anything out. When I am magically thinking, I can tune it out at any time. Some doctors misunderstand me and then try to overdose me. I am very lucky now to have a doctor who understands this part of me.
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